the death of a . . . fish

our lovely beta fish, dawson, passed away today :( I'll never forget the day Neill brought him home. The night before we had a huge blowout about getting a dog. I really wanted a dog (and still do) and neill - the dog hater that he is - refused to budge on his no dog rule. come the next day, i get home from work and he surprises us with a fish. i was beyond livid and yelled a lot about how unfair it was for him to be able to have a fish when I couldn't have a dog. I was so mad, I told neill he had to fry dawson up and eat him. what can i say? i've got a temper. while i did hate dawson originally, my feelings have grown to luke warm regard. most of the time i completely forgot we owned him as neill took charge of his care. one week when neill was out of town dawson completely slipped my mind and i didn't feed him once. oops. this is making me sound like a very negligent and thoughtless person. don't judge me. i cared for dawson in my own way. for example, as he declined over the last few months I've urged neill to put him out of his misery so he did not suffer. while no one wants to kill a fish, it was so sad seeing him unable to swim around. i can only hope that he wasn't in too much pain. neill and i just flushed him and the last thing neill said to him was "she never liked you that much anyways". i think we are going to sell our fish supplies. neill says he wants to take a break from being a fish owner. i guess he is really broken up about it. or he doesnt want to have to clean out the nasty fish tank anymore. thats probably what it is. but seriously. bye, dawson. you were conceived under less than perfect circumstances and you had a negligent mother, but somehow you still turned out to be an awesome fish.