wedding porn

oh.my.gawd.

there are so many wonderful and beautiful and amazing wedding blogs

So far, I've started following

A $10,000 Wedding

A Windy City Wedding

Etsy Wedding

From "I Will" to "I Do"

it is addicting. yesterday, i spent probably 4 hours of my morning trolling wedding websites and goo goo gawing over ceremony and reception sites. I also started an account at The Knot and ready every single yelp review of Chicago wedding venues. It is very easy to see why it is so easy for couples (brides) to get swept up in the whole thing and end up spending thousands of dollars on an extravegent, everything must be perfect and just right event.

the urge to have perfection is definitely understandable. it is a once in a lifetime thing. but, whose to say what perfection is? i keep telling myself a wedding isn't really about fancy place cards or specialty serving dishes or ornate center pieces or any of the material things that go with the wedding industry. and yes, let's not fool ourselves, it is an industry.

the question i need to answer then is how can a couple create a wedding that serves their needs and wants and NOT the wedding industry machine. if we decide to reject the ideas propogated by wedding magazines of what makes a beautiful wedding we are left with the work of exploring our own beliefs and desires and expectations.

I find it overwhelming to think about creating our own traditions and our own beauty. I worry that my ideas won't be good enough. That they will be empty and meaningless. It is scary to think about dissapointing family and friends. It is so overwhelming and scary that there is a part of me that wants to just go with the flow and follow the checklists and guides that martha stewart provides.

BUT, i hope that i don't. because, in the end i would really like to have a wedding that is fully ours. because a wedding is about family, old and new. it is about celebration. it is about love. it is about continuing meaningful traditions. it is about radiating happiness. And these are things that no website or expert or any amount of money can give you.